Eddie's Story
Thud, thud, thud.
My heart was pounding in my chest. I had no idea how I could still hear his voice over the sound of it.
"Do you see what happens when you mess with me now?!"
Click.
The girl in his arms with the gun held to her head screamed and he jerked her to the side, silencing her scream to a whimper.
"Shut up! You did this to yourself! You're getting what's coming to you!"
It was about then that I made a pretty idiotic decision. But I guess I should go back to the beginning and let you in on what's exactly is going on. Wouldn't want you to take everything out of context here. It's only fair that I tell the whole story, so that no one else is done any further injustice. And let me tell you, there is a lot of fucked up shit that goes on in this story. I don't suggest that the weak hearted read this. After all, it is a pretty tragic story. But I'm getting ahead of myself again. Now, where to begin?
I think I know a pretty good place. I guess it all really started at the beginning of the second quarter, when Eddie first moved over here and started coming to our school. He was one of those kids that you could tell was awkward the moment he stepped into the room. Not trying to be mean or anything, just stating honest facts. He was in my homeroom, geometry, so I got to be his guide for the day. I have to admit, at first I was really bummed about the whole thing. Then I realized that I hadn't even given this kid a chance, so I decided to rethink the whole thing. I was determined not to be like the other assholes in school that just automatically make fun of the new kid.
So anyways, there I was, guiding Eddie through his first day and giving him little tips where I could. Turns out, we had plenty in common. We shared a hatred for geometry, and a love for Pokemon. He was even in to all the old retro gaming systems that I was. And here I thought I would never find a nerd friend who quite understood me. We would talk for hours about the pros and cons of different systems, how the Dreamcast was better than all of the newer systems combined. Needless to say, our friendship grew pretty quickly, and I found out Eddie was a pretty cool kid. I also found out I was his only friend. As I suspected, all the other kids in my school shunned him for his general demeanor. It wasn't his fault that he seemed awkward from far away. But they still made fun of him for it, like I knew they would.
I always did my best to keep Eddie happy and keep him from really taking anything they said seriously. Usually, that worked for me pretty well. He always seemed to be able to brush their comments off his shoulder and remain the happy nerd that I knew him to be. He was always a pretty upbeat kid, and I always admired him for that. In a life that was so cruel to him and everyone else, he managed to keep a smile on his face. I always thought it was for his mother, who was raising him by herself since his father died in a construction accident. It was a terrible thing, I heard. They didn't talk about it much though, and I never asked. Figured that I should just let the dead lie where they were, especially in the heart of my new best friend and his mother.
School went on as normal for a while, until some kids decided that starting rumors would be super duper fun. And for once, I was actually the center of it. Well, Eddie and I shared the spotlight of the school gossip. People decided it would be funny to say that Eddie and I were a gay couple. Me, I could have cared less. Even if I were gay, I wouldn't let people turn that into a tool to bully me with. But Eddie on the other hand, took it kind of harshly. In fact, he got downright pissed about the whole situation. Poor guy started getting into fights over it. Naturally, he never won a single one of them and got his ass kicked. The popular kids always had back-up to start ganging up on him. I tried to help, but either I wasn't around, or I got beat too.
This is when things started to go awry for Eddie and I. See, he let his hatred for those spreading the rumors spread to pretty much everything. I noticed him getting darker and darker, retreating into himself more. He was acting out more, too. He kept getting grounded and started failing classes that I knew he was a genius in. I had no clue what was going on with him, or how he could let a rumor get to him this bad. Then I noticed that he was also distancing himself further and further from me.
That hurt me pretty bad, I'm not gonna lie. This was the first real friend that I had in a long time. Sure, I had other people to talk to and hang out with, but he was the only one that I could really relax around. Not to sound sappy or anything. And I knew for a fact that I was his only friend that wasn't on X-Box Live or some site. So, I was really confused by the fact that whenever I asked him to hang out, he flat out told me no. He avoided me in the halls, and in class. I had no idea what I had done to deserve this sort of treatment, so one day I decided to confront him.
The final bell had rung, and I knew exactly where his bus was. I sprinted out of my class to be sure that I would get there before him. There was no way he was going to avoid me this time. I wouldn't let him.
I looked all through the crowd of people for him, becoming pretty impatient. Finally, I saw him striding toward me unknowingly. He was looking at his feet as he walked, and I could see that his body was tense as he attempted to walk past unnoticed. It didn't really work, because there were still people that called things out to him. But, he just kept walking. Right into me. He looked up, somewhat startled, and then his eyes became cold and hard.
"What the hell do you want?" He said to me, his voice bitter and dripping with acid. I felt the shock and pain on my face at his tone of voice, but it seemed to stir nothing from him. No sympathy, nothing. My friend was gone.
"What do I want? I want to know what the hell happened to my friend! Why do you keep avoiding me like I have mono?!" We were starting to draw a crowd, and Eddie narrowed his eyes at me.
"You want to know why?" He spit the words through his teeth, his voice a growl. "Because all of this is your fault. If you hadn't come around and fucked up my life, no one would be saying I was gay and I wouldn't be getting my ass kicked on a regular basis." His voice got louder and louder with each word, and the crowd around us kept growing. They were even starting to egg us on, but I tuned them out.
"You can't blame me for the things all these assholes did! It isn't my fault these 'peers' of ours find it funny to torment kids! And it's your own damn fault that you get into fights." I realized that I was letting my temper get the better of me, and I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. When I opened my eyes again, I was somewhat calmer. "If you want to blame me, fine, nothing I say is going to stop you. But when, and if, you're ready to be rational and civilized, then you know where to find me." As I walked away from him I heard lots of booing and yelling behind me, the voices of the other kids begging for a fight. But I wasn't about to fight him. He was still my best friend in my eyes.
After that, I didn't hear from Eddie in weeks. I tried talking to him, but he avoided me even more now, and he somehow turned his mother against me too. I pretty much faded into the background again, not really getting any unwanted attention from my fellow classmates anymore. I wish I could say the same for my old friend. Things only got worse for him. He was skipping classes, and when he did show up, I saw various bruised and cuts on him from the fights he had gotten in. He was getting suspended and failing all his classes.
Just when I thought things couldn't get worse for him, it did. But I was around to see it this time. See, I had been going to my next class and I saw him talking to this girl. She was the queen bitch of our school, but I had no clue what her name was. I had a few classes with her, but I didn't like to associate with her. Suddenly, I heard her laugh loudly and people started to gather.
"You think I'd go out with you? You have to be kidding me!" She laughed again coldly, and her little band of followers, who I didn't see before, laughed along with her. "Besides, don't you like men, Eddie-boy?" With that, she laughed and walked away from him. I saw him clench and unclench his fists, and I walked over and put my hand on his shoulder.
"Hey man, you o-"
"Get the fuck away from me!" He shouted, turning and punching me right in the eye. Luckily for him, a teacher was nowhere in sight. I just held my eye and walked away from him while he called after me, yelling various different derogatory names. I didn't look back.
I stopped looking for Eddie. I stopped trying to talk to him. It was obviously a lost cause to try, because he wasn't going to turn back and ask for forgiveness. Not when all he seemed to do is get worse. Not to say I stopped caring, I just stopped going out of my way to check up on him. That was probably one of the biggest mistakes I could have made. Maybe if I had kept trying, none of this would have happened. But, I was just being stupid.
School had been normal again. I sat in class and tolerated all my teachers and worked hard. I remember being shocked that Eddie had bothered coming to geometry at all after about a month of just not being there. I guess I should have taken it as an omen, but I just shrugged it off. Regardless, what happened next shocked us all.
As the teacher was turned around, writing notes on the board, Eddie started to reach into his bookbag. I saw the glint of black metal, but before I could do anything, Eddie had held the gun up and shot our teacher in the back twice. Before anyone had the chance to scream, he turned and shot a few of the more popular people. It was then that the screams started and Eddie felt safe enough to grab the teacher's keys and be sure the door was locked, then decided to push her desk against the door. After that, he grabbed the queen bitch and held her like you always see the bad guy holding the hostage in movies.
"Everyone shut the fuck up and get on the ground! Get away from your stuff, or I'll shoot her!" I was in pretty much a state of shock, and complied with what he said as my heart began to beat hard in my chest. "All I've gotten is a rash of shit from everyone, and I'm tired of it! You'll all listen to me now! None of you will make fun of me now!" He laughed, a sound that was so chilling and deranged that it sent a shiver of fear down my spine. "It's all your fault that they all had to die!" Eddie yelled to the room full of teens.
"Do you see what happens when you mess with me now?!"
Click.
He had cocked the gun again, and it was ready to shoot. The queen bitch squirmed and whimpered in his arms a bit, and that agitated Eddie. "Shut up! You did this to yourself! You're getting what's coming to you!" Like I said before, this is about the time that I made the biggest mistake of my life.
Adrenaline pumping through my veins, I got up and tackled them both to the ground, and the girl got loose and managed to run away. Unfortunately for me, Eddie also still had the gun. I tried to wrestle it out of his grasp, but he had a damn strong grip. Something went wrong in the struggle though. All I heard was a bang, and everything went black.
Did I mention that it was also my last decision?
Yes, I'm dead. I have been for a bit. Shortly after I died, I could see again, but it was almost like a dream. Really, I was just being released from my body. I got up and looked around, seeing myself on the ground with a bullet hole in my head. I also saw the queen bitch, lying on the ground and bleeding from her stomach. I guess my last efforts were pointless. Lastly, I saw my friend on the ground near me, sobbing. I watched as he whispered his apologies to my corpse, and put the gun in his mouth. I listened to the final bang that determined the end of Eddie's life.
Of course, the surviving kids moved the desk and unlocked the door, allowing those who were waiting outside to try and save us all, but were too late. The police and ambulance showed up and carted the bodies off. I believe I heard them say that there were a couple of people that were still alive, but hardly. There was a lot of sobbing among the crowd, and lots of shock and commotion.
Eventually, everyone's parents were informed. I visited my own parents and sister first, and tried to communicate, but they couldn't feel or hear me. They were all so very upset and hurt because of my death. I watched as my mother slipped into a depression and my father became distant. My poor little sister, I don't even know how badly this is going to impact her life. I just hope that she'll pull through and be stronger than before, I don't want this to break her.
I also visited Eddie's mother. I honestly don't know which visit broke my heart more, the one to her or my family. She had lost her husband and her son now. She was all alone. Not only that, but everyone saw her son as a monster. Really, Eddie wasn't a monster. The blame isn't all on him in this situation. I hate that I'm not there to defend him in his death.
What happened is just as much the fault of the people that bullied Eddie as it is his, and mine as well. He never would have done it if he hadn't been pushed to the edge. And he wouldn't have done it if he had a stronger support system to help him through it all. Yeah, I know what you're thinking. "He was the one to bring the gun and shoot everyone, he didn't have to." I know that. You know that. Hell, everyone knows that. Doesn't change the fact that he isn't the only one to blame.
Ever since then, I've been in this sort of limbo. I don't know if there is anything past this, heaven, Nirvana, whatever you believe in. I have no idea if this is it or if there is something more. But I had to tell Eddie's story, whether anyone listened or not. I needed to show people that bullying someone doesn't just affect the person. It affects everyone around them.
Now that I've gotten it all out, maybe I can move on. Who knows. I guess I'll find out eventually.
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RolePlayGateway/~3/3hFSOMXo2M4/viewtopic.php
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